An Honest OPEC Minister

July 1, 2008 | By PA Pundits |

Honest OPEC Minister:

If he were honest, the leading OPEC minister would look you in the eyes and say:

“We are at war with you stupid infidels. We have been since the oil embargo in the 1970’s. But you are so arrogant, you still haven’t even recognized it. You have more missiles, bombs, and technology, so we are fighting with the best weapon we have and extracting, on a net basis, about $700 billion per year out of your economy.

We will destroy you! Death to the infidels! While I am here, I would like to thank you for the following strokes of brilliance:
You are not developing your 250-300 year supply of oil, shale and tar sands. We recognize if you were to do this, it would create millions of jobs for U.S. citizens, expand your engineering capabilities, and keep the wealth in your country instead of sending it to us to finance our war against you fools.
Thank you also for limiting Defense Department purchases of oil sands from your neighbors to the North. We love it when you confuse your allies.
Thanks for over-regulating every segment of your economy and thus delaying, by decades, the development of alternate fuel technologies.
By the way, thanks for limiting drilling off your coasts, at ANWR in Alaska, or anywhere there is a bug, bird, fish, or plant that might be inconvenienced.

It is far better that your people suffer! This, despite the fact, that Norway, Sweden, and Denmark, three of the most environmentally sensitive countries in the world, are aggressively drilling in the oceans off their coasts. You see, they are technologically savvy and informed and recognize that the likelihood of oil spills from drilling today is
minuscule.

Why, even during your devastating hurricane Katrina, of the approximately 13 oil rigs that were damaged or destroyed in the Gulf of Mexico, not a single drop of oil was spilled.

I am also most happy to see our lobbying efforts have been so effective. Corn based Ethanol. Praise Allah for this brilliant idea! Perhaps you truly will destroy yourself from the inside with these types of ridiculous policies. Surely this is a gift from Allah, praise his name!

We probably would have never even thought of this one. This is even better than when you pay your farmers not to grow food. Instead, have them use more energy to create less energy and simultaneously drive food prices through the roof.

Finally, thank you for foolish politicians you have sent to the U.S. Congress! We appreciate them letting us fleece you without end.

You will be glad to know we have been accumulating shares in your banks, real estate market, and publicly held companies. We also finance a good portion of your debt and now manipulate your stock markets, currency, and economies to our benefit.

How can we ever thank you enough, America! All this and you even protect us militarily from our regional enemies. Praise be to Allah. Allah is great.”

[Here's some great Graphics and Photos about ANWR from Atlas Shrugs ---ed]